Tuesday, December 1, 2015


Good day and I hope you had a great week thus far. Today I pose the question not as an end all solution but to point out the characteristics that I had forgotten I had when it came to resolving conflicts.  What if children ruled the world? I do this in the hope that it benefits you the reader or at the very least will make you think the next time you are in a conflict. 

Let me start with a story. I was recently watching a pee wee football game. It was a very competitive and close game. Towards the end of the game, there was a flag thrown that many in the stands disagreed with and it ended up deciding the outcome of the game. Conflicts ensued, words were exchanged, lots of yelling and lots of shouting went on for another 30 to 45 minutes.

I am sure you can guess who was doing the yelling and shouting. Yup the parents on both sides.  Do you know what the kids were doing? For the first 5 minutes “players” (the kids) on both teams, were mesmerized by the actions of their parents.  Parents from both sides rushed the field and got in the faces of the referees.  Then something amazing happened.

Both teams sat down on the field, slowly took off their helmets and shoulder pads, and gathered together and started talking, and then soon started to play random games together, or talked about their school stuff. They completely tuned out their parents, and the results of the game. 

As an outsider who happened to walk up when the conflict happened I could not help be amused. The looks on the parents as they were going to their cars in the parking lot was stress, anger, concern.  The look on the kids’ faces before coming in contact with their parents were joy, laughter, and harmony. 

Somewhere between pee wee football, and perhaps late 9th grade we lose the perspective of conflict resolution.  What is it that allows children to get upset one minute and go on playing the next minute? What an awesome skill to have.  Can you imagine a world where conflict was solved by 5-8 years old, and the rest of the world was run by adults?  A world where adults had no say in arguments? No say in who to go to war against? No say in whose ______ was better or worse? What an awesome world. 

I think the reason why children of that age have this ability to move on, is the fact that at that age they see the world as “all possible”.  If I can’t have it now, I can have it in a few seconds.  I may not even want it anymore.  There is no scarcity.  There is nothing more important than feeling good.  Does this sound familiar?

Children are natural teachers of the Universal Law of Attraction (LOA).  How awesome is that? Yet as a father I am constantly overriding their natural instinct to just feel good. How often could I just let them be happy? How often is it really necessary for me to intervene?   If I am honest with myself much less than I actually do interfere. This is a lesson for me to hold back and let my kids work it out for themselves, or to allow them an extra leeway here and there.  It also makes me want to learn to behave more like a child the next time an argument comes up and think to myself, will pursuing this argument make me happy? Is it really worthwhile to be unhappy and win the argument? You have to be the judge in your case. I hope this makes sense to you. As always please feel free to comment on my Facebook page and leave me tweets, and follow me on Twitter.  Till next week, to your success. 

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